The Weight of Strength: Mental Health, Masculinity, and Survival

Posted by Doddy Collince OKelo on 17-Feb-2026

To grow up in Africa is to be shaped into a statue, expected to stand tall, look solid, and never show the cracks where the pressure is breaking you. To be an African man is often to be told you are a metal, strong enough not to bend, not to feel the cold under the hammer of life no matter how hard it hits. We are taught that to cry is to surrender masculinity, and to speak of a breaking heart is to be branded weak.

Strip away the myths, and what remains is the courage in expression. There is strength in naming what hurts. And that courage, the willingness to be fully human, is exactly what is needed to confront the mental health emergency unfolding across our continent.

Across Africa, mental health disorders are increasing gradually, yet with growing urgency. In Kenya, government data from the Ministry of Health’s national clinical guidelines indicate that approximately 10.3% of the population experiences common mental disorders, including depression, anxiety, and substance use challenges, while a significant proportion of individuals seeking primary care present with psychological distress.

The impact, however, affects different groups in different ways.

Many men struggle with untreated depression that often goes unrecognized because it presents differently. Instead of visible sadness, it may show up as irritability, anger, emotional withdrawal, risk?taking behavior, or substance abuse. Cultural expectations of stoicism, provision, and emotional restraint discourage vulnerability. As a result, many men delay or completely avoid professional support, often seeking help only when the situation has escalated into crisis. Globally, men account for the majority of suicide deaths,  and Kenya records several suicide deaths daily

Young people, particularly those aged 18–35, remain highly vulnerable. The Kenya National Adolescent Mental Health Survey (KNAMHS) found that roughly 44.3% of adolescents reported experiencing mental health issues over the previous 12 months, with depression, anxiety, and related symptoms common, driven by economic pressures, social challenges, and uncertainty about the future.

At the same time, access to care remains limited. Kenya has fewer than 150 psychiatrists serving a population of more than 50 million people, fewer than one psychiatrist per 100,000 citizens (World Bank, 2022). Specialized facilities such as Mathari National Teaching and Referral Hospital shoulder overwhelming demand, while community-based mental health services remain underdeveloped. Rural communities face even greater shortages, and stigma continues to delay early intervention.

Several structural and cultural drivers sustain the crisis:

·        Rigid norms around masculinity that equate vulnerability with weakness

·        High unemployment and financial pressure; substance use as a coping mechanism

·        Limited mental health literacy in schools and families

·        Persistent stigma that frames mental illness as moral failure or spiritual weakness rather than a health condition.

When emotions are suppressed, they do not disappear. They resurface as anger, withdrawal, addiction, risk?taking behaviour, or violence. Suppression may look like strength in the short term, but over time it deepens harm.

Addressing this crisis requires more than awareness campaigns, it demands systemic and cultural change. Mental health literacy must be integrated into schools, workplaces, faith spaces, and community forums. Therapy and counselling should be normalized as preventive healthcare, not reserved for crisis. Kenya’s Mental Health Act and the recently launched clinical guidelines aim to expand capacity for early diagnosis and treatment, but implementation requires sustained investment and training for frontline health workers. (Ministry of Health Kenya)

Primary healthcare facilities should routinely screen for depression, anxiety, and substance use disorders. Youth employment initiatives, entrepreneurship programs, and mentorship networks can reduce economic stressors that directly contribute to psychological distress. Peer?led men’s support groups create culturally relevant spaces where vulnerability is modelled rather than mocked. Digital platforms, including teletherapy and helplines, can expand access, particularly for young people already active online.

We should understand that pain must be processed, not buried. The pressure to be the unshakable provider in unstable economies is real. But resilience does not mean repression and strength does not mean isolation.

When men speak, they are not abandoning masculinity. They are reshaping it. When they seek help, they are not surrendering pride. They are choosing survival.

The strongest metal is not the one that never bends. It is the one that can be reformed without breaking.

If you or someone you know is struggling, reaching out is a vital first step. The following services in Kenya offer confidential support:

• Kenya Red Cross – 1190 (Toll?Free) – 24/7 Psychological Support
• Befrienders Kenya – +254 722 178 177 – Suicide Prevention & Emotional Distress
• National Authority for the Campaign Against Alcohol and Drug Abuse (NACADA) – 1192 – Substance Abuse Support
• Mathari National Teaching and Referral Hospital – 0713 699 715 – Specialized Psychiatric Care

You are not less of a man for feeling. You are not weak for speaking. And you are never alone in seeking help.

@DoddyOkelo